A bubbe maisse is a tall tale told by grandmothers in the shetl.
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Octopus
Like a four-headed octopus, the men’s arms are stuck to the bar, fingers suctioned to the edge – a Tsunami couldn’t peel them off.

One is late to meet his wife but he can’t stop telling the cocktail waitress lounging bored in her station, about his job as a day trader. He’s bouncing back and forth on the balls of his feet, between her and his friends, not wanting to let any of them out of his sight. His words tumble out in time to the shuffle and if he weren’t wearing such a nice suit, would be a dead ringer for the homeless man on the other side of these walls. Strip a man of his clothes and he’s just another human being looking over the abyss, wondering if it’s time to jump.

The man to his left is talking to their other friend in a loud, stentorian voice about the things he wants tell his wife. Some of things he wants to tell her are, “You are so fucking boring. You know how boring you are? You’re so boring.”  His friend nods in a way that makes me wonder if he’s picturing his friend’s wife naked – the memory of a time in a hotel still weighing on him like the sticky heat and he gulps down what’s left of his Manhattan.

The fourth moves to a table, exhausted from holding his large body up. The things his friends are talking about are beyond his understanding - he doesn’t have a wife and his job is nothing to speak of. When they part ways tonight, he’ll duck into a strip joint and peel off his hard-worn dollars for the girl sitting next to him, pretending he’s neat. Truthfully, it’s not so different from these guys – habits borne out of working a shit job together years ago and with no better word for it, ended up calling each other “friend”.

As the bar fills up, the men leave and go their separate ways: One to sleep fitfully beside a woman he loathes. One drives thru the canyons to a large house which at one time held promise and now is just a shell. The trader pops a pill to calm down before meeting his wife for a dinner to which he will arrive late, and the last is getting comfortable in an uncomfortable place, a new drink in hand and a pretty girl making him feel like the movie star he unquestionably is not.
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